Here, Hold My Beer

Stories that will break your funny bone and keep you in stitches...and you won't have to go to the ER!

Humor/satire about the dumb things that guys will sometimes do...you know, those decisions that usually start with a trip to the liquor store and end with a trip to the ER. Or to the police station. And almost always to the doghouse. These are "The fish was THIS BIG" stories that are sorta-kinda mostly true.

You know those videos where men do things like balance a ladder on a stair railing, use a handcart in place of a spare tire, or light firecrackers and launch them at each others' crotches? Well, this is a compilation of stories such as those where some man somewhere has a moment of sheer stupidity and asks his friends to hold his beer while he tries to kill himself.

So if you like to hear those "chill 'round the fire pit, guzzlin' six packs and spittin' tobacco at the flames" kind of stories, this book is for you.

DISCLAIMER--Now, because we're dealing with good ol' boys who are common sense challenged and grew up watching Evel Knievel performing jaw-dropping gravity-defying stunts, I have to make the standard cover-our-butts-so-we-don't-get-sued statement:

MEN--If you really think you should try some of the stunts in this book, you probably ought to consider finding a sensible woman to marry. Seriously. Or call yo mama before you hand over that beer, dude.

WOMEN--If you are a sensible gal who is considering getting into a relationship with a man who has ever said, "Here, hold my beer" just before he tried any similar stunts to those in this book, you may want to call your mama and get some good advice. Or maybe just go out with the girls for a glass or three of wine and meet someone less inclined to life and limb endangerment. Otherwise, count on knowing 911 operators on a first-name basis and spending a lifetime sipping burned coffee out of cardboard cups, while squirming on hard plastic chairs next to sneezing snot-nosed kids and watching ridiculous talk shows in the ER waiting room.

You. Have. Been. Warned.